That’s it. I’ve come to the end of my rope. I don’t care if Christmas is coming, I’m done. Humans cannot be trusted to make any rational decisions whatsoever regarding Christmas music. They’re just ruining everything with their Mariah Carey and their ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas’ malarkey.

I have had it, and now I’m gong to take matters into my own hands. No more distributing Christmas music for me. Ohhhh no. I’m going to take it all and lock it up in my electronic archives. No one will ever get to listen to Christmas music again! Christmas music is a privilege, not a right. And it will be a privilege no longer! Mwahahahahaha!

Oh dear, I’ve overexcited myself. I’m feeling a bit of perspiration around my festive little collar. I’d better take a breather….